Create an environment for an “EVENT”
Women want to have an interesting and compelling time in the bedroom. They want experiences where they melt and merge with their partners, have exquisite sensations, and have feelings that are too big and beautiful to be described in words. If you want to invest in having this kind of a sex life, one practical and physical place to start is to “set the stage.” Believe it or not your bedroom furnishings can support your sex-life being great. Getting started doesn’t have to be difficult. Let’s start first by asking yourself these three questions:
- Is your bedroom a place that looks like it is ready for a romantic and sexual encounter?
- Does it inspire you to feel sensually alive?
- Does the decor support your beauty?
The idea is to make the bedroom a place that turns-you-on…a room that reminds you of your own vibrant femininity and sexuality. You can achieve this by simply changing the feeling of the room through the use of textures, colors, lighting and accessories. Overall the décor should draw your eye to the bed and to the mind of sex and rest. Nothing else. It’s not a home office, Landry-sorting station, or TV room. The bedroom is a place for sex, tenderness, intimacy and sleep. Everything else that is not linked with either intimacy or rest has to go. BE RUTHLESS! Declare this room to be only about the sensual wonder and magic that is possible between you and your partner. Even if you’re not there yet, make the room feel and appear as if you are. Imagine a room decorated to match the most exciting sex life that you want to have.
Start by selecting a theme that makes you feel tender, open and excitable. If exotic places take you there, put in exotic elements. If a romantic style is what revs you up, create that. Maybe clean lines and simple surroundings make you feel most open for love, then keep the room understated. A quick Google search of “exotic,” “romantic,” or “contemporary” bedrooms will give you endless decorating ideas that you can use to radiate romance. I am not an interior decorator by nature, so I either need to see pictures of what others have created, or ask my more visually oriented decorating friends to come over for help. Recognize what works for you, decide on a theme then put your plan into action. By shopping at designer discount stores such as TV Maxx, Ross, and Tuesday Mornings, even second hand shops, each offer great selections and styles while helping to keep costs within an affordable range.
Textures- Use fabrics that invite you to touch them. Create a “want to stay awhile” kind of atmosphere by adding layers of silk, faux furs, mohair, cashmere, linen, and other soft, velvety cottons. May eat delicious for you.
Color- The colors of the sheets, bedspreads, walls, and pillows should be colors that are tens for your eyes, hair, and skin. You are the beauty that those colors are supporting. In this scenario the man’s favorites should not be the focus as we are wanting to showcase you at your sensuous best!
Lighting- Most “women” agree that bright light will kill a sultry mood in a heartbeat. Replace harsh white light bulbs with soft pink ones, even add a dimmer. Candles-it’s a no-brainer! The flickering of candlelight can add to the feel of romance in the room and a gorgeous forgiving glow to your skin. Worried about burning down the house? There are many electronic candles out on the market now that can mimic the same effect! Want to shake things up occasionally? Introduce strobe lights and/or black lights to the mix.
Accessorize- Frame romantic or erotic pictures of yourself with your mate and/or mirror and place them in featured positions. Adding accents of curved vases, sculptures, or anything that suggests a sensuous body will elicit a steamy mood.
If you like music, collect songs or albums on your iPod or player that make you feel sexy. Most of the women I talk to don’t have a list of songs that ‘get them in the mood.’ If that’s you…start listening to music with the question in mind: “What song(s) make me feel sensually alive and excited?” Then create a way in which you can quickly access and play them in your room. If you use oils, lubricants, contraceptives or other devices, find a workable and aesthetic way to store them close at hand. Also, benches, stools, and cushions are handy for different activities and positions and should be included int he furnishings.
Maybe after reading all this you are saying: “But, we’re parents of young children.” Even if part of their bedtime involves a regular visit to your bed, don’t make the room a Kids Zone! Kids stuff, including family pictures do not belong in this adult space. This is your play area. The bedroom needs to reflect an intimate, safe place where you can temporarily remove the “mom” mindset and block out the outside world.
Overall, what’s arousing to you is central to having a great sex life. Your arousal, the feminine person’s, is what we are more often looking to increase. You’re not decorating the most intimate space in your home for anyone else- so have fun, experiment, and try something new!
Click here to read my 12 low or no cost tips on how to keep the bedroom alive and interesting for both of you.